


Too Little Too Late

by gimmekensei



Category: Bleach
Genre: Break Up, Emotional Hurt, M/M, One Shot, Prompt Fic, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:14:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25056025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gimmekensei/pseuds/gimmekensei
Summary: Losing his powers had created a domino effect on Ichigo's life. It resulted in a failed relationship, cut ties and while he'd managed to close those blistering, open wounds, Hitsugaya still seems to want to talk about it. That must be why the Captain is really back...right?
Relationships: Hitsugaya Toushirou/Kurosaki Ichigo
Comments: 9
Kudos: 31





	Too Little Too Late

“So we’re finally going to have this conversation Toshiro?” Ichigo bit out. He didn’t even have to turn around to know that the mentioned Captain was right behind him. But Kurosaki couldn’t get himself to turn around from facing his bedroom wall and met Toshiro eye to eye. “You knew that I would lose my powers and you didn’t try even _once_ to reach out to me! What kind of boyfriend are you!?” Ichigo snapped only to whirl around on his heel to finally face the silent Captain.  
  
“No, correction. You’re a shitty ex.” Ichigo growled, looking about ready to punch a hole in the nearest wall. “And look at you. You can’t even defend yourself, nor will you ever. You’re like the rest of them. You just follow orders without questioning anything. Do you even have a spine?!”  
  
“.....Ichigo, I’m a Captain. I have to act in the interest of Soul Society, not in the interest of one particular individual.” Hitsugaya cut in, but his comment only seemed to pour more salt on the open wound.  
  
Ichigo scoffed at that. “I was your _**boyfriend**_. I’m not just a stranger that you pass by on the street!!”  
  
“Ichigo, I didn’t ask for any of this to happen. But I had my orders, while I wished to be there for you, it was impossible at the time. Think about it logically.”  
  
“HA! Think logically?” Ichigo laughed cruelly, mocking Toshiro’s very words. “You weren’t thinking logically when Momo got hurt, but where was I? Right by your side, fighting together to defeat Aizen!! You didn’t even try to find me afterward. I lost any last opportunity of seeing you and instead, Rukia was there for me till the last minute! I-I wanted to see you-” Ichigo choked up at feeling his throat tightened and covered his mouth with a free hand. “I knew deep down that this wasn’t going to work, but you didn’t even allow me the chance of seeing or even holding you one last time.”  
  
“....Ichigo..I...know it won’t mean much now, but I regret it every moment that I wasn’t near.” Toshiro bit out, looking uncomfortable in his own skin from where he stood right in front of the same window he had crawled in through.  
  
Ichigo dropped shakily to sit on the edge of the bed. He didn’t have the heart to keep their sight connection and rather settled with burying his face in his hands. “I-I know..but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m mad.”  
  
“You have all right to be mad.” Toshiro added quietly and took a step forward, wanting to reach out and touch Ichigo once more, but by the sudden stiffening in Ichigo’s muscles, it became clear that wasn’t the best move to be making. He halted and suddenly felt awkward, not even sure what to do with his own hands. Should he cross them across his chest or clasp them? |  
  
“You know, I spent months analyzing our relationship to see where we went wrong,” Ichigo whispered, still tense. “You know what really hit hard? You never told me you loved me back. Why’s that Toshiro? An explanation is the least you owe me.”  
  
“.....I was too frightened by my own emotional tie to you that I...I couldn’t get myself to say it as quickly as you could.” Hitsugaya whispered. It was a struggle to be this open and honest, but Ichigo deserved this. Ichigo was so right. There had been so much he could have still tried to stay connected with the teenager, but he hadn’t. He just followed orders like a good little Captain and continued to go about his day like nothing was different. But it had. Each day had felt utterly empty and hell, he had missed Ichigo’s presence so badly.  
  
“Frightened?” Ichigo repeated only to laugh weakly. “God, Toshiro I would have given you all the time you needed in the world to say it, but a hint that you even cared a bit would have been nice…!”  
  
“I-I tried, but-”  
  
“Well, so much for trying.” Ichigo hissed. “I could make a whole list of all the things I did and you didn’t even seem to care. How about the time I got off from work for your birthday and you ended up staying in Soul Society to go out drinking with your Lieutenant?”  
  
“I forgot-”  
  
“Bet you did.” Ichigo snickered. “Or the time I trusted you enough to sleep together for the first time? You left right afterward like I was some random person you found in the streets to roll in bed with. Abandoning me in your own quarters just added to the blow.”  
  
Toshiro stiffened, his hands balling up into small fists at his sides. Ichigo was so right, but hearing about it and having it thrown back into his face wasn’t making him feel any better about this whole mess.  
  
“God, I don’t even know why I’m harping on this. I wasn’t going to breach the subject, but you had the nerve to appear here and well…” Ichigo sighed and straighten up, dragging a hand through his hair. “Whatever reason brought you here….drop it. This,” He waved his hand across in thin air. “Is over. We could have maybe picked the pieces up and tried to rebuild our relationship, but it would only collapse again the next time my powers are threatened.”  
  
“I-Ichigo, look I-”  
  
“Toshi…” Ichigo smiled bittersweetly, no longer the shouting mess he’d been earlier. Getting his troubles off his chest had helped a bit it seemed. “Just go. Live a good life and when you and Momo get together...well, I’ll be happy for you two.”  
  
Hitsugaya’s eyes flared at that. “So you won’t even allow me to defend myself? Or hear me out?”  
  
“You had your chance already, and it passed you by.” Ichigo remarked only to flash a sad smile. “It’s okay, Toshiro. We both just need to let go.”  
  
Toshiro choked on his own words and turned rapidly on his heel before Ichigo had a chance to see his face break into a pained expression. “I...I did love you.”  
  
“....yeah..?” Ichigo whispered only to smile weakly once more. “Well, that’s good I guess.”  
  
“Everything you did, didn’t go unnoticed. I just...I…” Toshiro started to stammer, gazing down at his trembling hands. Ichigo opened his mouth to interrupt, but he soon closed it. “I know I messed up, and though I know it sounds like an excuse I was too overwhelmed with the war with Aizen and the possibility of losing Momo that I...I failed to see at the time that was hurting you. I failed you. I know it’s too late to fix it, but I-”  
  
“I get it, Toshi...I really do. Look, I shouldn’t have lashed out...and I know I came off harshly, but...be happy okay?” Ichigo whispered. “I really do want that for you..wherever you end up in life.”  
  
“....I wish the same for you.” Toshiro responded. His mouth felt so dry and his eyes felt wet and god, he could barely keep a tight grip on his own emotions.  
  
“......” Ichigo paused only to utter quietly, “Goodbye Captain Hitsugaya.”  
  
Finally Ichigo used his title properly, and yet it hurt to hear it. It was just another way to wedge a gap between them. Sucking in a shaky breath, Toshiro gave a weak nod, “Goodbye Kurosaki.” Slipping out the same way he came, Hitsugaya left Ichigo to his own thoughts and aching pains.  
  


* * *

  
  
_“I love you, y’know. A lot.” Ichigo grinned and nuzzled the back of Toshiro’s throat as the Captain tried to sit up properly on the edge of the bed to finish dressing. He tried to press a kiss there, but all of the male's shifting around prevented that._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Hnn…” Toshiro mumbled under his breath, straightening the fabric he was clad in before getting up to brush himself off. “I will return in the evening.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Ah, right…” Ichigo paused, only to flash another smile. “How about I pick up something for us to eat? I can even bring it by the office if you plan on working late-”_ _  
_ _  
_ _Toshiro shook his head at that and placed his haori on. “No need.” The Captain stilled momentarily before leaning over to graze the top of Ichigo’s head with a gentle kiss. “Later.”_  
_  
“...later…” Ichigo mumbled, watching Toshiro leave only to bury himself under the sheets and pillows. “.....” He sighed quietly only to glance up to check on the time. Maybe Renji or Hisagi would be free? He just needed to kill this growing fear of his..._


End file.
